Not the Blarney Stone(s)

Before I say anything else: YES, THIS REALLY HAPPENED TO ME ABOUT 3 MINUTES AGO.

It's Sunday at 1 pm, and we have been major slugs today. The boys are just now finishing up in the shower, I am still in 'jamas, consisting of an oversized s-shirt, on the couch.

I hear a car door close outside and catch the flash of window over my shoulder. I glance out the blinds. Yes, it's who I think it is. It's our insane neighbor, Bud. Yay.

*doorbell*

I wrap the woobie off the couch around me and answer the door.

Bud: "Hi, you remember my chow right?"
Me: "Yes, Bud, I remember your chow."
Bud: "Well the woman who comes to let them out during the day noticed that my chow was having difficultly peeing. I hadn't really noticed but she works at the vet's office and told me the chow was having a problem."
I nod sympathetically.
Bud: "Anyhow, the chow had to have immediate surgery and they removed three bladder stones from her kidney this big" He makes a circle with his fingers the size of a quarter.
I nod sympathetically again.
Bud: "So I wrote this note to the doctor because I don't want any more animals to suffer like my chow" Bud sticks a note written on a hotel notepad piece of the paper up in my face for me to read. It's handwritten in the best likeness of 10 year-old serial killer physician block lettering I have seen lately.

Dear: Dr. [Vet's name]
From: Bud Neighbor* (name altered to protect the "innocent")
RE: Chow Dog Kidney Stones
Please save the kidney stones removed from Chow Dog on 3/11/06 and show to all your clients to prevent further such illness of pets.

Bud: "Well I wanted to let you know that you can go up and see the stones any time you want. I don't want this kind of thing to happen to other animals."

Bud: "You do take care of your animals, don't you?"
Me: *thinking of our four cats* "Yes, Bud, of course."
Bud looks at me a moment, at my disheveled hair and red eyes wrapped up in woobie goodness. "Is everything okay?"
Me: "Yes, Bud, everything is okay."
Bud: "Is everyone doing okay?"
Me: "Yes, everyone is okay."
Bud: "Good, I just wanted to let you know you can see the stones anytime."
Me: "Okay, Bud, thanks."
Bud: "Okay, see you later."

I shut the door and run into the bathroom. The water is off and I hear rustling behind the curtain.

Hubby: *who heard the doorbell in the shower* "Yes?" He peeks at me around the side of the curtain, an amused look on his face.
Me: "Bud's chow had bladder stone surgery and wants the vet to save the stones to show all their customers. He wanted us to know we are welcome to go view them anytime."
Hubby: "He wants us to go visit bladder stones at the vets office?"
Hubby and I share meaningful look.

Me: " I HAVE to go blog about this..."

WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!